Tag: Career

Meeting Temple Grandin

Meeting Temple Grandin

This past week I was fortunate enough to attend a conference where the speakers included none other than Dr. Temple Grandin, as well as Britt Collins (an amazing OT) and Joanne Lara, executive director of the organization Autism Works Now.
As an autism parent and someone who works in the business of helping people with disabilities, as well as someone who self-identifies as being somewhere on the spectrum, I have been anticipating an opportunity such as this for some time now.

When I arrived at the hotel where the conference was being held, I looked around for some signs of where to go next. As I looked to my left towards the in-lobby Starbucks (I really needed coffee), I saw her trademark western rodeo-style shirt. Temple Grandin.

If you know me personally, you may know that I can get a *little* star-struck. I walked up to the counter to order my coffee and found myself standing immediately to Dr. Grandin’s right side. Do I talk to her? No, she’s having a conversation with someone. Get it together, kid, you’re acting weird. Just order your coffee and pretend that you’re a functioning adult.

I followed my internal dialogue’s advice and ordered my coffee. I *may* have stared a little too much at Dr. Grandin, because a couple of times she turned slightly to look at me. Oops. Social graces are not always my strong suit.

I made it around to the space reserved for this event and found a long table covered with easily 100 different book titles. Many of these titles are already available in the Autism Lending Library that I manage, some were new to me. At the far end was Dr. Grandin, standing next to the many different books which she has written throughout her career. People were already gathering, and she was speaking with each of them individually. “Are you a parent or a teacher?”, she’d ask. Depending on the answers, she would carry on the conversation with questions about ages of children, different personal interests, and whether they worked with people who are autistic who have held jobs.

I found a book which I did not have in the library, and for which she’d written the foreword. I waited my turn and quietly asked if she’d mind signing it. I was holding back tears and a large lump in my throat as I did this. The moment that I’d been waiting for was actually happening right now, and I fought my impulse to ask her for a hug (I’m weird, but not that weird).

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I swallowed hard and asked for a selfie, and after the photo was taken I barely eeked out “thank you”.

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holy mackerel, I’m standing RIGHT next to Temple Grandin.  Is this for real??
She autographed books and stood for photos with literally hundreds of people as she listened to their stories.

At almost seventy years old, she’s had a lifetime to figure out what she can and cannot handle. I was pleased and impressed when she would comment that she was quite used to this if someone asked if it was too much.

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By now I’d moved on to other tables to find a large array of sensory items. Given that I manage a lending library that includes many of the items shown, I was happy to take a business card and sign up for the mailing list. I was very excited to see the same noise-canceling headphones that Speedy used at school, and quickly bought them.

I found a booth for an agency called Transitions which helps teens and young adults with the often rather abrupt transition to college. I thought of my now 16 year-old who may indeed have this struggle, and I spoke with a young woman who I think is likely autistic about this program and who they support. I was pleased to learn as much as possible about this program, because often I am asked by providers about available services in New York State.

When the conference actually started, I sat in the back of the very large room and tried to take in the sheer magnitude of it all. Noise filled the space as attendees trickled in, and soon it was almost unbearable. Eventually someone approached the podium and announced the start. He warmly introduced Dr. Grandin to the room, and showed a short film that included clips from the movie which carries her name. I’ll admit that I have not yet watched it, and typically we avoid films about autistic people because we live this. It’s hard to watch, to be frank. But after seeing this short set of clips intermixed with interviews with the stars of the film, I think I’ll be more comfortable watching it.

The hair on my arms stood on end as the gentleman introduced her finally, and every person in the room who could stand, did. I got choked up and realized that this amazing woman has spent her life talking about what it’s like for her, and that people are drawn to her story in such a way that a feature film about her life was made.

She said many things which did not surprise me: bring back art and shop and home economics to schools. Kids should work when it’s legal to do so, in whatever way speaks to their personal strengths. Parents must give kids the chance to TRY something, everything, rather than helicopter them. Presume competence, and support people in their strengths rather than fixate on deficits.

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Um, yeah. All of that.

I could go on for days, I really could. What I really want to say here is this: I know that there are people out there, particularly some adults on the autism spectrum, who have been angry about her messages about getting out and working. The impression I’ve gotten is that there are some who feel that her message ignores those who are not able to work for a variety of reasons.  I can’t speak to how each of you have taken her words, but I do wonder how many have gone to see her speak. Perhaps we just won’t agree. But I do feel that people should be able to work for a living doing something they love, regardless of ability, if that’s what they want to do. I feel that those who cannot work should still be supported doing something that they love, in whatever way they can do the thing that they enjoy.  She wants people to be included, not secluded, and in a way that meets them where they are.

The other speakers were absolutely important to the message of the day, and I would like to dedicate separate blog posts to them. I gained a LOT of knowledge from the speakers of the day, especially Britt Collins.  I will be writing about her because I’ve been putting in to practice some of her ideas in the past few days, and they’re working.  Can you say broccoli?  Or shrimp?  Yeah, WonderBoy tried both in the last two days.  Her work deserves a LOT of attention.

I will apologize for the quality of the photos.  I was using my phone and zooming all the way in… now we can see the downside to sitting in the back of the room!

The scary things are sometimes the best

Sometimes the biggest and most terrifying steps in life can be the ones that save us.

Six months ago, I walked away from the job I’d known for 8 years (in a field I’d worked in for my entire life) to start my new career.

To say that I was terrified is a dramatic understatement.

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What will we do for childcare?”

Having worked from home for 8 years with a fairly flexible schedule, this was the scariest question. How do you normal office-dwellers do it??

Obviously, we figured that one out.

 

I’ve worked alone for this long, won’t that be weird to be in an office?”

When I left the solitude of our home to go be in an office every day, what happened next was unexpected… or at least it was to me. You’re probably reading this thinking “well obviously, I could have told you that this would happen.”

I started really seeking out opportunities to participate in the world around me. Much to my husband’s amusement, I even joined the Special Ed PTA and am being nominated to be the secretary. Because you know, I like to do ALL THE THINGS.

I found my tribe, I found the place where I can truly be myself, and I have grown more in six months than I ever thought possible. I have dreams again, the people and the agencies I work with every day inspire me, and I once again have that feeling that we can change the world.
I thought I would never feel that feeling again, after I left the naivety of my twenties.

Finding your passion isn’t as simple as sitting down and thinking about what you want to be when you grow up. Sure, that’s what we’re taught to believe, but the reality is that it may hit you in one big “a-HA!” moment or perhaps several smaller micro-moments.

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(Me, presenting sensory-related things to people who actually sat and listened to me! For two whole hours!)

How it strikes you will vary, but the fact that there is something out there for all of us is undeniable. You too may find yourself telling your executive director, “I have the funnest job ever!”*

 

And we will be here for you when you do have that moment.

 

*Yes, I actually did that.